


The Young Woman and You (the Drone)

by ASockAndEt



Category: Original Work
Genre: POV Second Person, Strangers to Friends, mindreading
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:08:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29234280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ASockAndEt/pseuds/ASockAndEt
Summary: Almost caught by a storm, a young woman and a drone disembark in a grey wishing town by chance. Thanks to a deal made reluctantly, this story depicts their day and night in this town and a friendship which somehow blooms between them. Also, the person controlling the drone can read people's minds and it sucks quite a lot.(In the second person perspective, also please pretend the drone does not make a sound in this story's world. I uh forgot that they actually make a very loud sound in real life)Trigger Warning: there is a short, not explicit, discussion of death and suicidal ideation in the epilogue





	1. Chapter 1

"Then we have us a deal," she says, sipping from her steaming mug of Quoran tea. You can tell that's what the tea is because it has the trademark blue flower peeping over the rim. Hmm, isn't that the hardy flower from the burning plains known for its spicy warmth? The brew's probably delicious in these wet and stormy conditions but... you're not sure if she's satisfied with this cafe's version of the brew.

Is she keeping her face neutrally blank on purpose? Well, if she does hate it, it's probably best to act like she doesn't care. It's rude otherwise, wasn't it? You also sneak a glance at her grey raincoat and long, orange hair. Somehow, they seem mismatching.

"Until the ferry to Roret arrives," she continues, "you can follow me around."

Hitting keyboard keys to direct your drone, you mimic dancing around in joy and say, "Yes!! Thank you very much-!!"

"Three conditions, however," she interrupts, putting a pause to your awkward drone dancing. "Only observe, don't talk, and don't read my thoughts."

You think about her conditions and then mimic nodding your head by tilting the drone forward. Noticing your mute agreement, she smiles wryly, a smirk on her lips and a brow rising cynically.

She explains, "You might not notice through your drone's small camera, but this town doesn't seem friendly. Everyone else took the earliest bus out of town so we're the only ones left."

You hadn't noticed. But then, you wonder what the atmosphere must have been like for everyone else to decide that right after landing in port.

When you moved your drone to drift after the young woman, you did at least noticed the town looked somewhat dreary and sad, the streets empty of people and the buildings small and grey. But isn't that because of the storm that nearly capsized the ferry that brought everyone here in the first place?

You want to ask her for more details but don't want to break your deal so early... you consider adding a screen to your drone that can display text but then you'd have to load in a bunch of different languages, right? Could the drone's motherboard handle that even with dimensional magicks you installed? And you'd have to worry about the battery power and the giga core as well...

The young woman's voice then filters through the speakers of your monitor, taking back your attention. On your monitor, she takes another sip and sighs. "I won't ask you why you're traveling either so don't ask me in return. That's a kindness we'll share as strangers who happened to have met."

Well.... you guess you can promise that! But it's a pretty common topic for travelers to share though people have always looked at you for your reason.

The young woman continues, "For as long as we're together, I won't leave you behind. If, however, you do want to leave, then by all means."

Ah, well... you're not going to go but it's kind of her say so. Sort of. She probably just wants to leave every avenue of escape open, huh? So very enthusiastically, you rock your drone to the side to mimic a head shaking no. She sighs again but the huffs that escape almost sound like a laugh.

"Also" -and you're wondering if she's going to keep setting new conditions and new avenues of escape here- "you said you were from Filancha. An isolated land with isolated people... all of whom can hear the thoughts of others. I like my privacy so respect it."

You quickly hover your drone up and down in the air, mimicking the head nodding You don't mention that most Filanchans need to be in-person to hear another's thoughts. That doesn't apply to you.

"Simply, I would like to exercise some caution around these townspeople. It would be much easier without someone else but..."

She pauses and it almost seems like she can see you through the drone's camera lens.

"I don't know. You feel too pitiful and helpless so it's like I can't leave you alone."

In the comfort of your bedroom, you can't help hiding your face behind your hands. You get this a lot whether in-person or as a drone. Through the spaces between your fingers, you watch her finish her mug of tea and set it aside.

"Well then, let's go."

Huh? Where???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please assume the drone doesn't make any noise...


	2. Chapter 2

You're not sure where you're going or why but you follow the young woman. She slings a dark-grey messenger bag onto her shoulder and then sets off through the quiet, empty streets.

Straight away, as the silence wraps itself around your head, only the steps of the young woman echoing through your speakers, you're swallowed up by the need to say something. You know it isn't awkward. You already know you're not wanted. Talking is only going to make things worse, like always.

At least if you withdraw into your thoughts, you can minimize the damage.

While she turns her head this way and that, seemingly looking for something, you also look around, trying to distract yourself. You have no idea what it is she's looking for but...

You take a look at the grey brick buildings with their darkened windows. They're so small as if they were trying to take up as little space as possible and hide. It feels like they're trying to say, "Hey, I'm not here! Don't look at me! I don't exist!"

But of course people do. You take a look at the grey pavement, the cracks and dark green weeds still speaking to some kind of life even if that life is long gone by now. And as the drone keeps hovering across, ah- look here, isn't that a bit of light pink gum attached to a bit of pavement? It's recent- there are definitely people living in this town. You just can't see or hear them yet.

Looking up from the pavement, you squint at the grey and cloudy sky above, wondering if it's really just the storm that makes this town so melancholic.

Moving your gaze back to the young woman, who is striding along searchingly still, your eyes catch on a certain balcony. There, sitting rather lonely-looking, is a rubber plant that looks well-taken care of. Under the dim sunlight, its leaves are a dark green but there isn't a single tear or rot on any of it.

There are people for sure, but it's like they don't exist. They _don't want_ to exist.

...The longer you look at this town, the more you can feel a dark cloud roiling at the bottom of your own stomach. It burns and seethes, bitter and cold, wanting to redirect its energy into something else. You struggle not to let it attack you. You understand a little better what she meant before.

You're also realizing that you never asked for her name. Oh geez, where are your manners? No wait, you already introduced yourself; where are hers?!

Up ahead, the sound of footsteps jars your attention from your thoughts. They don't belong to the young woman's; they sound in between her steps. The difference is easy to hear- hers are a steady, quick pace while the other's is softer and shuffling.

The streets aren't as empty as you thought as the two of you come across an older man with a thin beard and spots of grey in his hair. He ambles along without much purpose like he's taking a stroll.

As you watch the young woman step up and try to start a conversation, you notice the older man's eyes are dark and cloudy. His eyes read as unfocused, focused instead on thoughts that don't seem very happy. Closer up now, you hear-

_What is there to do when I get home?_

There's a quiet buzz you didn't realize before like the static of white noise on television but turned down so quiet.

"Excuse me," the young woman says.

_I could finish that book but I don't feel like it. I could finish that knitting project but I don't feel like it. I could do anything but-_

That white static doesn't tell you anything. It's full of nothing and yet everything at once. But it's so quiet that it doesn't tell you anything.

"Excuse me," the young woman says again.

_I don't feel like doing anything._

You still feel frozen though. The effort of wresting yourself away is like trying to walk knee-deep through mud.

The young woman coughs and the older man startles, his eyes clearing. The buzz is quieter now. You also shake your head a little to clear your mind. You try to redirect your attention towards the two's conversation, watching the man's eyes glance between your drone and the young woman warily.

"Excuse me," she says with a small, polite smile, "but I was hoping if you could direct me to an apothecary?"

The older man's mind seems to stall for a little while, registering the kindness on the young woman's face and the strangeness of your drone. The smile on her face grows wider, friendlier, and this seems to persuade him. He relaxes and speaks again.

_Why not? There is nothing else to do anyways._

There is almost no white noise at all but instead a fuzzy map of the town drawn in greys, blacks, whites, and the image of a shop with a sign in front.

The older man responds with clear, precise directions and the young woman pulls out a notebook, nods her head, and writes. You think of a notebook like thoughts so you take care not to catch a glimpse of her pages. You do notice it looks well-worn, however, with earmarked corners and crinkled pages.

_Now what do I do?_

...And the white noise returns. Just in time, you have your drone hover back an inch (kind of embarrassed you didn't do that before) and escape the worst of it.

As the young woman thanks the older man, you see his eyes start to glaze over again. He nods and begins to amble down the street again, hands stuck in the pockets of his sweatshirt.

This time, both you and the young woman hear him mumble, "I wish I knew what to do."

You agree with him. Nervous energy is always raring to be burned. Meanwhile, her gaze remains on him for a few moments and you're surprised you don't know what she's thinking. Then she turns and crosses the street, slipping into an alleyway. Quickly, your drone pursues her.

As you follow her through snug alleyways and meandering streets, passing the occasional ambling person with their own wary glances, your mind burns with curiosity. What does she want to get at an apothecary? Was she on the ferry to Roret for this reason?

It would make sense since Roret is the capital city! You can get practically anything there from Garan foxes to Yetil saplings and even Horo star specks! And from what you hear, the Roret Auction is special just to look at because of how theatrical the whole city is! Intricately woven purple and red banners everywhere, a show of tricks and intellects on every street corner, and restaurants sporting colorful dishes along with colorful spices! Well, that only makes sense since the country's history is deeply entwined with the arts.

Yes, just like this, you don't have to struggle with the urge to make everything "better."

It's just too bad that the more you get to know and wonder about the world, the more things you know you'll never experience personally.

"Oh, I forgot to mention."

The young woman speaks up and, immediately, you (gladly) lose track of your thoughts. You see her stand underneath a tree overlooking the sidewalk, a familiar-looking sign hovering on the upper left corner of your monitor.

"My name is Scana," she continues. "Feel free to forget it."

You commit the name to memory. But this still doesn't answer what she's looking for and why!!


	3. Chapter 3

At the apothecary's, Scana asks for Kurag roots.

Kurag roots! You do a quick search online, surprised that you had never heard of such a plant before. All that time spent at home usually leads you on information chases all over the internet...

This time around, you make sure to hang back as far you can while still being able to hear the conversation.

The petite woman manning the counter is surprised at Scana's request too as she brings a hand covered in band-aids to her chin. Hmm, maybe handling plants gets tricky though you don't know much about how an apothecary runs. Also, you remember her flinching when Scana walked in.

"O-One moment please," she says, looking troubled before walking into a room behind her.

_Kurag? Kurag? I've heard that name before..._

...it's faint but it's... it's still there? **Why?** You try to distract yourself.

Kuragkuragkurag- a plant that tends to grow in the dreariest, rainiest regions- what did it look like again-

_Was it the blue-leafed bushes? Oh, where did those go- I don't even know if we still have the roots-_

Some distance from your mind's eye an image of a plant nestled against clods of dirt and stone on what looks like a cliffside appears. Then an image of hands not yet covered in band-aids move up, draw closer to the plant, and pluck it-

...itfeaturesblueleaves withspikedends. Theseplantsarerare notonlyfortheiruniquecolor butthepropertiesoftheleavescanbepoisonous too. Theroots however canproduceavarietyofeffects likespontaneouscombustion or memory-erasingpotions ifmixedincertainproportions andwithcertain ingredients.

...There's still the image of a dark backroom with shelves full of dried and fresh herbs, hands grasping for a plant. A feeling of uncertainty is crawling around the top of your head.

_Here it is but- didn't Furo say this was poisonous?_

The image of a blonde man with a scar across his eye smiles at you as he ruffles your hair. He pulls his hand back, a leaf between his fingertips. You laugh- you're not laughing.

_W-What could she want with poison- or was that the leaf? I don't remember- why does Furo make me talk to people- why does he trust me? I can't remember things and I-I can't deal with anything-_

You wish drones worked on you. You wonder if you would be happier if they did.

"Hey." Scana calls you out of your thoughts and you're surprised that she's out of the drone's sight.

...A conversation does help to remove the white noise. It's a distraction even if you're still distracted by someone else's-

You're looking at an empty register and you think you heard Scana somewhere to the left and behind. You input directions, looking for her somewhere between the shelves of dried herbs, stacked cabinets of pills, and crates of potions. **In doing so, you also moved away from the counter so you shouldn't hear her thoughts anymore-**

You soon find Scana standing in front of the shop's window, a selection of potted bushes, trees, and herbs to the sides of her. Backlit by dim sunlight and frontlit by the apothecary shop's warm electric lights, she appears strangely distant yet warm. Her arms are crossed and she looks at you with brows drawn together. She looks like she's trying to figure something out and for once you're not sure what someone is thinking-

"Are you okay? That was the most still I've seen you," she asks, squinting harder. It looks almost caring and you're wondering why she's asking. Without thinking, you open your mouth to respond and then hastily move your hands instead.

But you pause, not sure whether to make a drone's nod or how to respond any way else. Even though you think she doesn't care about your answer in the end, you still think about her question. And you're realizing an odd something about your time together...

Well, now isn't the time to think. You leave it at: you don't know if you're okay, or if the burning uneasiness at the back of your head will ever leave, but you do feel better that she asked.

Scana opens her mouth to speak again but you move the drone up and down in a nodding kind of gesture. She tilts her head up with a neutral expression, but then the tilt to the side makes her appear doubtful. Again, it looks almost like caring -it scares you because how do you respond to a stranger's caring- but she doesn't say anything else.

Behind the drone, you hear the click of a door. Scana looks past you, eyes just slightly widening. Probably now, you think, Scana is getting a better understanding of the petite woman's thoughts.

_I think I got it! I think I got it!_

Just how loud can someone think?

You give up.

"Um, I apologize for the wait. We don't get many people asking for Kurag roots." When you turn the drone, the petite woman is slightly trembling. In her hand is a tied-up pouch, the straps swaying slightly with her motion.

Scana pauses for a moment but it isn't long before a small, polite smile is on her lips again and her eyes are crescents. The petite woman, on seeing such a friendly expression, seems to relax a little.

"No problem," Scana says, taking out her wallet. "What's the price?"

"Oh! Oh, um-" The woman shuffles in place, eyes shifting from one place to another rapidly. Your mind is suddenly flooded with prices, plants, and calculation flying around like leaves in a hurricane. You don't know what's happening or where you are. "F-Fifty five Kurets please!"

They exchange coin and pouch while you quickly reorient your mind. But you do catch the flinch from the woman when her and Scana's hands touch and you know Scana catches the harried whisper that escapes the woman's lips-

"I wish I didn't have to do this..."

Scana's reaction is immediate. By the time the petite woman looks up again, Scana's already-sweet smile has stretched further and her eyes have curved into friendlier crescents.

By the time you register her change in expression, Scana is already waving goodbye and exiting the shop, saying smoothly, "Thank you very much! This saves me a lot of time."

Thrown off by her speed, your drone hurries after her. Behind you, you hear the petite woman stutter out, "Ah- Th-Thank you very much for your business!"

_My voice sounds so stupid- I'm sorry- I wish I could just stay in the mountains forever!_

...When someone wants to be heard, you guess you can't stop them.

Even though you know these kinds of thoughts are common, ordinary, and no need to fuss over, you still feel bad just hearing them. You wish you could forget.

...Although you won't be forgetting how strangely friendly Scana can be when she wants. How come she's so rude to you...


	4. Chapter 4

*Du-ring du-ring*

The sound of a ringtone goes off as you and Scana exit the apothecary's. You're a little confused because you hadn't expected to hear a ringtone while visiting this town.

Ah... why is that...? Oh, it must be because it doesn't seem like the residents here would want to be around anyone else. Of course, of all the people to fit that sentiment, it would definitely be Scana... you wonder who's calling her.

The young woman fishes the phone out of her bag (wouldn't you normally put it in your pocket?) and scowls after a look at the screen. To your surprise, she answers anyways.

"What do you want, Doc?" Scana answers without a single greeting. Huh, she must know this person pretty well.

But ah! You catch yourself and turn your drone in the opposite direction plus up to the sky. Let's do our best to consider others' privacy, okay~?

If you have the choice to mind your own business anyways. Because, although you can't hear the other side, you sure can hear Scana's clear as day.

"I got your stupid herb. What more do you want?"

"Huh? You want me to find a buddy of your's? Why should I? And I hope I don't have to tell you that locating me by GPS is just creepy."

"...Really, huh? So you're that desperate."

"Alright, alright, I get it already. I already decided."

"Sure, I'll find your friend. But I will hold you to your word."

With that, Scana doesn't wait for a goodbye either. You hear the snap of her phone shutting. Then-

"Hey! Let's go."

You whirl the drone around, surprised she actually called for you this time. Normally, she just walks away... then again, she did call out to you in the apothecary's so is it out of character or not??

"What are you facing away for? Weird," Scana says, looking suspicious. "Did you see something over there?"

Damned if you think about someone's privacy and damned if you don't, huh...

Scana takes a single second longer to stare at you and then simply walks away. "Follow me. Last stop for the day."

Ah, you're getting left behind again... but it's nice she said something! Still, not knowing where you're going is starting to leave you with a burning curiosity...

The two of you wind your way through the gloomy streets again. It's quiet as ever but you think you're getting the hang of not talking. Maybe you'll get used to being quiet... and this feeling like everything's going wrong?

You turn your attention back to the monitor. It's not good to always stay stuck in your thoughts even if you can't follow that advice every time.

On the screen, Scana is carefully eyeing every building so it looks like that "Doc" friend... or acquaintance... gave her a specific location. You would help her look, especially since you have the aerial advantage, but...

Well, can't exactly say anything, can you? Scana sort of feels like she might call you out on a minor break of your deal and you don't want to take the chance...

...although truthfully, the two of you never had to make that deal. You're just a person manning a drone. You can go wherever you like, no matter the time of day or the distance between towns. But you get the feeling no matter how far you go, you'll never find what you're looking for. You can feel that this is fact. A fact burned permanently into stone.

If being alone won't change that feeling, maybe being next to someone will?

As more time passes, Scana gets more and more irked. You feel yourself get more and more antsy. **But it's not like you could say anything to make her feel better, now can you?**

The near-empty streets now totally empty out as the sun begins to set. You don't see any more people walking by or milling about. No footsteps, or sounds of whistling, no keys and coins jangling in pockets.

Thanks to the storm clouds too, night arrives more quickly. Storms always bring on extreme temperatures. You imagine it might become chillier but you're not sure if there's any wind to make it chilly.

Where you live, it gets sticky and warm from the humidity. It really sucks!

You sneak a glance at Scana, wondering if you can tell if it's chilly or warm from her reaction.

Hm... hm... huh...

Scana looks this way and that with narrowed eyes and pursed lips. The dark raincoat she's wearing makes it hard to figure out if it keeps her warm or cool. Same with those dark jeans and sneakers! Ah... there's no way to tell, huh... but at least she doesn't seem too bothered by the weather.

Satisfied with this, you take a look around the town again!

Oh, the lamp posts are flickering on. Where it was starting to get too dark to see, now there's little fields of light winking on along the streets. But despite that...

...it's even gloomier than before. With the storm clouds totally hiding the sun (or maybe the moon now, who knows?), the town doesn't benefit at all from the beautiful light of sunset. Instead, it just seems to skip straight towards darkness. Although the lamp posts should give the place a warmer glow, the complete silence only gives the town an eerie sense. Plus, all the windows in town are dark. Like no one's here.

A ghost town.

Sure doesn't help you're looking at the town through a monitor. Maybe you've played a bit too many horror games. Your imagination is fantastic and should be utilized less often!

You sneak a glance at Scana, who doesn't seem intimidated by the silence, emptiness, or eerieness. Actually, she looks more impatient than before, throwing out sighs and dirty looks. You're sure she won't be so crossed when the two of you meet that "Doc's" friend, but woah! What a short temper!

And that reminds you- the longer you stay beside Scana, the more you learn about her. She's polite with people she meets for the first time like with that older man. She's respectful of people's wishes like with that apothecary employee. She might be rough with you but she still accepted your deal (even with conditions that make it seem like you're thin air).

Although Scana might be irritable, leaves you behind without a word, and does seem like she could easily insult you, you remember her calling out to you in the apothecary, asking if you were okay.

It's never been so surprising to discover something new about another person. To have to guess and look at their reactions. To have to look at their face and try to read them like a book.

For once, it feels like you're actually interacting with someone and they're comfortable interacting with you. There's a burning feeling that seethes at the corners of your eyes. It feels a lot like regret but also makes you feel like saying, "Let's try one more time..."

As you finish this line of thought, your heartbeat jacks up ten notches. Manically, you jab at the keyboard so the drone just barely swerves around Scana, who's just stopped and standing there.

 _Please say something next time!!_ That's what you think to yourself as your head thunks down on your desk. You try to steady your heartbeat for the next few moments. When you have a look at the monitor again, to your surprise, the dark green of a pine forest is in view.

Huh, before you know it, the two of you have reached the outskirts of town.

"Ah-hem."

You turn the drone around to see Scana raising an eyebrow at you."You good?" Scana asks, tone completely unworried. "That was a noise you made."

You make a drone's nod while shaking your head in real life. She doesn't seem concerned if your answer is a lie this time and motions with her head to the building.

"You seem interested in the sights. Notice anything weird about this building?" Scana says. Again, you're not really sure why she's asking.

But this does imply she's seen you spinning the drone this way and that. It shouldn't be, but why is it so embarrassing to be called out like this? Isn't this like being called a tourist and getting laughed at when you're awestruck by a sight other people call ordinary?!

Ah!!! You get this way too much!!

Although- Scana doesn't seem to be laughing at you, which is pretty nice.

You look at the building, wondering what Scana is implying by "weird."

In comparison to the rest of the town, this building's just as dreary, grey, and brick-lined. The sign out front says "Durinhue Motel." Nothing seems especially odd as you angle the drone up but, with that, you notice...

...in comparison to the rest of the town, this motel is really tall, huh? And it doesn't look like any windows face the town? Every window and balcony you can see looks out at the forest. Hey, that-

"Must be a nice view, huh?" Scana comments. You feel a jolt of shock, wondering if she's reading your thoughts. For someone else to do that, that wouldn't be a first. But in the corner of your screen, she gazes at your drone with her head inclined to the side.

Oh, she's just guessing because the drone is looking up, you realize.

Nice guess!

The drone motions a nod. Scana seems satisfied with the response and, without another word, walks towards the motel's entrance. Always getting left behind, poor you...

Please wait, Scana!!


	5. Chapter 5

When the drone enters the building, you're hit by a sudden feeling of being squished. When you took a look at this town earlier, you noticed right away how small the buildings were, each squeezing tinier into their spaces. Houses looked like apartment buildings and apartment buildings looked like... apartment buildings.

Every building looks the same like no one wants to stand out.

Huh, but... no matter how much someone wants to hide themselves so totally that nothing remains, something always peeks through. Because people never really want what they wish for.

That's what a once-friend told you anyways. You're not sure if it's true! Maybe always? Maybe sometimes? Maybe part of it is right and part of it is wrong? Who knows!

When it comes to not standing out though, this motel sure defies that. Sort of. It rises into the sky like a dandelion peeping up from the concrete but, just like the rest of the town, the actual rooms are so tiny. Your drone could float across the whole ground floor in seconds.

Despite being so small, the lobby doesn't look cluttered at all... because it's hardly furnished. The most notable things are an unpatterned, dark brown rug that covers most of the floor, a lobby desk at the back of the room, and a blank-faced receptionist reading a book behind it. She glances up at your and Scana's arrival but otherwise continues reading. There are stairs to the right of her.

Furthermore, there are no decorations on the walls... no posters for local events, no decorative flourishes like painted flowers or wooden arches, no shelves with random odds and ends like potted succulents or vases or... anything.

This lobby doesn't even have couches, tables, or chairs for people to lounge around if they were waiting for someone else. This motel doesn't seem like a great... meetup spot, huh? But hey, anybody could say that about the whole town!

The only "decorative" thing, aside from the rug, is just a small window to the left with a view of the forest. And it's a gloomy... kind of scary view?

The moon should have risen by now but all the moonlight is blocked by storm clouds. From here, the forest looks pitch black, uninviting, and even a little leering. Geez, sometimes you're really glad it's a drone and not you exploring the world!

Meanwhile, Scana takes just a glance around the lobby and then walks right up to the receptionist. She must not be bothered by how uninviting too this motel looks.

On the other hand, you hesitate to move closer to the receptionist, who doesn't seem bothered or excited that there's a potential guest. From this distance, you don't hear her thoughts and you watch her simply slides a bookmark between the pages of her book. The receptionist looks up, politely neutral eyes peering over glasses.

Scana asks, "Excuse me but is a guest by the name of Durin Advers staying here?"

"Yes." In a quiet voice you can barely hear, the receptionist answers straight away. Instinctively, you move closer to hear her better while thinking, "Huh? Off the top of her head?? Does that mean she has good memory or are there that few guests here?"

The receptionist continues, "Would you like me to call him down?"

_Annoying._

Clear and resolute, it's a voice that doesn't actually care if it's heard. You wonder if it would actually be received joyfully because then the polite mask could be dropped entirely.

You kinda understand her. Only certain people would come to a town like this and they must be pretty hard to deal with. In the end, it's hard to live without being connected to people no matter directly or indirectly, but still...

"...You can do that?" Scana asks, surprised.

Right??? You were under the impression that anyone who comes here doesn't want to see anyone! You definitely thought the two of you were gonna be shooed away!

_Irritating._

Even more so with THAT attitude!! What a cool receptionist!! To have such mean thoughts while keeping such a neutral expression!! That acting ability is too amazing!!

Closing her eyes and looking like she can barely hold back a sigh, the receptionist explains what seems to be a common question for her, "I can inform the guest that there is someone who would like to see them, but they can choose to accept or decline."

_They usually decline. What's the point in making me ask? Don't make me ask._

"I see. You're the messenger." Scana nods and seems to take a second to think it over.

Sorry, miss receptionist, but... she's totally gonna make you ask!Scana continues, "I was asked to find out how he's doing and I'd like to see for myself. Could you call him down and say we were sent by Doctor Bureak?"

_Damn it._

Sorry!!

The receptionist replies with a quiet "Of course, wait here a moment" and stands straight away. She walks up the stairs, bringing along her book, and returns soon. Instead of returning to her desk though, she hovers on the second-to-last step.

_What a surprise._

"Mr. Advers has accepted your request. I'll show you to the meeting room and he will come down shortly."

Hooray!! But huh? A meeting room? This place has a room especially for meetings?? Is this an office building or a motel???

Scana looks doubtful for a second too, her brows furrowing and a frown on her lips. The receptionist only waves a hand behind her, gesturing for us to follow, as she walks up the stairs.

_Come on. I don't have all day._

...The meeting room is just one floor up. It's the only door on the first floor and you get the feeling every floor only has one door. You mean- c'mon!! If the ground floor was so small, of course the other floors would be just as small!! There isn't enough room for another room!

That said, this meeting room feels pretty cozy. In the center of the space, a brown rug similar to the ground floor's is spread over the wooden floorboards. A low table sits on atop that with black cushions placed on every side.

For some people, this room might feel too stuffy but you think the windows on the wall across and right of the door really open the space up. It honestly isn't too bad of a meeting room (though at least some wall decorations might have been nice)!

"Thank you for the help," Scana says to the receptionist before she enters the room.

"It's no problem," the other replies. You're not sure if Scana can hear the barely-audible sigh that just escaped her lips, but you're pretty sure she would ignore it. You enter the room too.

Before she leaves, the receptionist is sure to add, "If you need any more assistance, please do not hesitate to drop by my desk."

_Finally. I wish I could read peacefully everyday._

...Good luck with that.

Scana nods at the receptionist before taking a seat opposite the door. Hm... if you took a picture of Scana in this moment, you wonder if that bright orange hair of hers would brighten up her gloomy surroundings? Especially with that pitch-black window behind her. It kind of feels like it would be a surreal picture- like she's sitting in a room in another dimension.

Musing over these thoughts, you -the drone- settle for a "seat" by the other window. You're really just hovering in midair.

You don't muse for long though as Scana eyes the door and then eyes you. She says quietly but firmly, "You've been doing alright so far but you get it, right? Around this guy, you need to be on your best behaviour. Got it?"

....You're not sure what exactly Scana means by "best behaviour" but it probably means "act like you're not here. You're air. Disappear."

Well, you can probably do that, no sweat! Just hurts a little...

But well, you also get that you talking here won't do any good. What exactly could you say in this situation? To a person who seems to have run away and become a hermit? You don't even know what to say to yourself. Your tries at a journal have only resulted in empty spaces.

In response to Scana, you obediently move the drone up and down. She nods and seems satisfied with that. Silence comes over the room as you wait for the mystery person to arrive. Scana isn't much of a talker, huh?

...you very much are though... the urge to flap your mouth is real...

Thankfully, it isn't long before you hear footsteps coming down the stairs. They're light, slow, and they sound hesitant. That must be the doctor's friend? You also hear a strange white noise as well, a noise full of many things but none of them can be picked and heard out. It's... it's hard to concentrate...

Every step down the stairs, the louder and louder the white noise gets. The sound of TV static, words, and images fill up your mind. His thoughts (his memories? his questions?) are crowding yours. You lose track of the footsteps; you can't hear them anymore. You lose track of time, lose where you are, lose a bit of who you are.

There is simultaneously nothing and everything. There is black and white and shades of grey, yellow, red, and every color. There is laughter and anger and tears and confusion (is it yours? is it scana's?) and there are so many people so when there is no one it is disorienting and saddening and relieving and-

...somewhere, you get the feeling the footsteps have come to a stop. Because the white noise doesn't get louder.

You're barely holding on. You're frozen by the intensity, the abundance of this person's thoughts. In your head (you think), between the multitudes of voices and static and questions (who's asking? to me?), a wondering thought asks if they're standing in front of the door. In your vision (you think), through the bouncing images and words and a hand reaching out (who-), you see it hasn't swung open yet.

It's been awhile. its been too long. since you were this overwhelmed. it's also been. awhile since. you met someone. like this. or were. in crowds. it's hard to hold on. only. only reason is because. the thought "just gotta wait, just gotta wait, it'll pass..."

And then a thought of panic rings through loud and clear-

_But wait, if that door opens and they come in even just a little-!_

In your vision, the door opens a crack.


	6. Chapter 6

When you wake up, the world is blurry, your cheek feels squished, and your hand feels a little wet.

Sitting up, the slight throbbing in your head confuses you but the familiar, if blurry, sight of your cluttered bedroom is comforting. When you pick up your glasses, which must have fallen off your face when you passed out, the comforting sight also becomes a little concerning. You've really gotta wash your bedsheets soon and throw all the dirty clothes on the laundry chair in a basket. The books on your desk can stay where they are though...

...but ahhh, passing out from white noise hasn't happened in awhile. You sit back in your chair, musing and trying to rub away your headache.

You're normally much more careful to stay out of crowds or keep your distance. One might say you were careless but meeting someone whose thoughts race so violently, intensely, and rapidly isn't so common. Or at least, you thought you were used to it by now.

**After all, it's so normal that it's sickening how normal it is.**

Actually, the whole 'used it to it' thought may be a lie. You wouldn't be using a drone if you really thought that.

...

Ah right! What happened after you passed out? How much time has passed? Did Scana's meeting go well? Are you still in the meeting room or did she take you to wherever else she might have gone?

Questions and more questions swirl around your head as you shake your mouse and wake up the computer. Well, the fact that your computer fell asleep is good since it means the drone wasn't using up its power.

The last time you passed out like this, you had to wait for the solar panels to charge the battery enough to wake the drone up. Luckily, no one had stolen or taken apart the drone in that time but, man, you'd rather not take the chance again.

Then again, with Scana around, she's definitely looking after your drone. She had to lug this whole junk of a contraption all the way to this room and the way she kept looking back to make sure you were following and even asking after your health multiple times- she'll definitely give you a lecture but she wouldn't leave you behind.

_Sometimes words are just words but her small actions still made the difference._

The thought fills your heart with warmth, which remains in your chest as you navigate menus to operate the drone once more.

What appears through your drone's camera is a small room sparsely furbished with just a bed, a desk and chair, and curtained windows. You're not sure what your drone is sitting on but a dresser wouldn't be out of the question if you assume a lot of the occupants stay for awhile...

Also, there are no decoration on the walls, not even a small poster or painting. Did she book a room in the same motel? Does that mean the meeting went well? You don't think Scana would have stayed here for that person's comfort if it didn't.

Outside the balcony doors, there's complete darkness. A quiet rumble of thunder makes it sound like another storm's going to visit the town soon. It's a little intimidating. The only light source seems to be a small lamp. Its soft light shines upon Scana, who is flipping pages and writing in her notebook. She's dressed in blue-striped pajamas and a night cap. It's... so cozy and cute on her? Ah, that shouldn't be a question.

It's!! So cozy and cute on her!!!!

But also, if you had to guess what kind of nightclothes she would wear, it toooooottally wouldn't be that!!!!

Cute pajamas aside, Scana's face doesn't express an inch of exhaustion. Her furrowed brows and the tight line of her lips makes it seem like she's super-concentrating on her work. You wonder what she's writing- maybe a journal entry? That reminds you of your own feeble attempts to journal, exercises in futility to keep track of the days spent isolated in your house.

But all those small, tasteless entries were back from before you fixed up a drone and started drifting through the world so journaling might be worth another go.

As you finish musing over this, Scana glances up with what seems like a cursory look, which quickly becomes alert as she probably registers the green light next to the drone's camera. She snaps her notebook shut and strides over, eyes narrowing skeptically.

"Are you back?" She tests.

Having the drone move up and down now would be overdoing it but you tap the up key quickly, sending the blades of the drone spinning briefly.

Scana's eyes widen in surprise before she sighs, a small, relieved smile curling the corners of her mouth.

Ah, so she really was worried about you.... Woah... an uncontrollable smile stretches across your face as a giddy feeling floods your chest. Woah!! You're super touched!! How sweet!!

Of course, Scana quickly reverts back to her usual scowl and starts to lecture you but you receive it happily. That little bit of sincerity was like discovering a rabbit-shaped cloud in the sky!! Like receiving surprise compliments from a friend!!

While you swoon, Scana begins: "If something is difficult, speak up. If you're worried about the deal, don't be. I'm not that heartless; do you know how worried I was when your drone stopped moving and you didn't respond at all? If something happened to you or you had to leave, at least tell me-"

Mid-lecture, Scana stops. Rather firmly, she shuts her mouth and stares at you blankly. More than a little confused, you start to open your mouth but... ah, you're not really certain if it's a good time to speak or what to say. Even without the deal, it's always been...

Before you can think of anything, Scana turns to the side with a frown.

"Sorry," she says, eyes glancing once, hesitantly, in your direction. "I might be overstepping."

That's- that's not-! She isn't- is she-? You're not sure what to think or what to say and your still-lingering headache is throbbing again as your head fills with a confused, frustrated white noise of your own. Stilted phrases, statements that become questions, no solutions-

Before you can decide to open your mouth, Scana's already moved on, her back almost entirely turned to you.

"Are you alright?" she asks, her voice quiet but somehow still frighteningly clear to your ears. Turned to the side, you can't easily read the expression on her face. And the question stumps you. Again.

You tap the up button again. And Scana turns away completely. The seconds between then and when she turns back again, face blank, are painful.

"You must be curious about Mr. Advers. He's okay, just took a long vacation without telling anyone."

Doubtful.

"My friend, Dr. Bureak, didn't believe it when I told her so she'll likely come to see him herself." Scana shakes her head and sighs. "I told her to see him herself since she'd end up going anyways. Of course she declines with some excuse about her experiments but look where we are now..."

Scana trails off. She stares blankly at you again. It's another opportunity to talk-

"Fine or not, I'm going to bed," Scana says. True to her word, she pulls the lamp's string, plunging the room into complete darkness. Your entire screen goes dark. It's hard to tell if you're still there or not.

...

You sit back in your chair and bury your face in your hands. Your glasses slide up your face roughly, a little painfully.

Dimly, you do realize Scana was a lot more talkative just now. Not just "I have to warn you not to overstep" but like "I feel comfortable enough to complain" kind of talkative.

What does that mean? Wait, be more specific- was Scana really comfortable talking to you? When did that happen? And why? And if she was comfortable, then all those times she got quiet... why would she stop herself?

No, that's a stupid question. It's obviously for you, your feelings, your sake. So she doesn't "overstep," she shut herself up. But that- you actually like how comfortable she felt with you. How she complained about her friend. So then, the obvious solution is to **say something** but-

Why can't you say anything?

...

You have all these thoughts and all these feelings but you can't express any of them. You don't even try. You might as well not exist for all the good you're doing.

...No, that's too harsh.

You take your hands away from your face and your glasses slide back down, slightly askew.

Avoiding people has never meant you stopped thinking about them or caring about them. It meant you cared and thought about them so much that your existence, your decisions and your actions, started to revolve around them. Didn't matter if they were there or not. Reading a book? Somebody cares about it but you can't seem to make yourself finish it. Taking a whizz? Well, somebody must care if you leave the toilet lid up or down.

Somebody always cares and you're always scared.

It hurts to think about.

But you have to.

You know, it's a little funny. This ability lets you see so much into people. It's supposed to be a cheat code so you always know what to say, when to say it, and how to say it.

But here you are. Alone. Wordless. Clueless.

It's a bright blue day outside your window but a soft, gentle rain leaks through your speakers. A stormy night has arrived where Scana is.

You sigh, wipe your eyes, and begin inputting directions to move the drone outside of the room. It's raining so you'll have to find some shelter (that rain-away spell inscribed into the drone is still finicky) but it's better than accidentally listening in on someone else's dreams.

Once you finish, let's brew some tea, close the curtains, and think very carefully about all of this.

'What are you scared for?'

You know the answer but you can't bring yourself to confront it.

You seriously need to relax. It's like every little thing and thought just sets you off. Maybe it would be good to put on some rain as background music-

...

.........

..................

\-------------------------------------------------------

_The sound of the grass rustling. The sight of each long, yellow stalk of dry grass swaying in the breeze. And an orange sunset that dyed the town red._

_Four years after I had left, those were all the memories I had of my hometown._

_My mother's kind voice, my sister's obnoxious laugh, the fact that our town should have faded into ashes decades ago. All those things weren't memories anymore; they were facts._

_In the two years after I left again, I have wondered, "Why did I ever leave?"_

_But the reason is still with me._

_The emptiness. The longing. A small little hole inside my chest that yearned for something I couldn't find in that little town. It squeaked and it whined and it yelled and it sang. But it never once ate. The feeling superimposed itself on every thought and action, on every day and night, like a ghost. It made me restless._

_"Wanderlust," my sister called it, her eyes slanted mischievously. "You should go explore the world. And mail us back souvenirs!"_

_I rolled the word around my mind, testing it. A feeling of satisfaction, resolution, or relief. If that little hole ate the word up, would I feel better? Would it stop crying?_

_But it still didn't feel right._

_But if I left, I might find what I was longing for._

_So I did. Every new town I found, every new continent I landed on, I would send back a gift to my family. I never stayed in one place long enough to receive a letter from them._

_But just like before, every thought I had, every step I made, the longing still remained with me through every day and night that passed._

_Before I knew it, four years had gone by. My memories of home were dwindling away, one by one. It made me uncomfortable. My mother and my sister at home, each humming away in that little house. If they knew, they would say, "What? If it bothers you so much, then come home! You worry too much."_

_So I went back._

_And when I stepped foot on a plain of tall yellow grass, clear daylight shining upon where that town was supposed to be, and when I heard what had happened, I wondered._

_What did it sound like? What did it look like? What did it feel like?_

_The sound of fire washing over the land. The grass thrashing in the breeze. My home and family turning into ashes._

_Should I have stayed after all? Maybe what I was looking for was there all along._

_I'm sorry I ever left._


	7. Chapter 7

When your eyes fly open, your heart is already in your throat and beating a mile a minute.

 _Oh no_ is your first thought. _Oh no, I'm screwed._

That was Scana's dream.

Why did you have to see that kind of dream?

A dream about the past. _Scana's_ past. Her past...

While you're still stiff with shock, the sound of rustling sheets hums from your speakers. Although the screen is dark, you can imagine Scana waking up, the boundary of reality and dreams blurring what's real in her mind. But she knows- the thought of someone else is in her mind- and she turns over, reaching for the lamp-

*click*

The screen brightens, showing a dimly-lit, sparshly-furnished room. And Scana, her hand still on the lamp's drawstring, looking at you. You flinch.

The nightcap has fallen off her head and her hair is wild from sleep seemingly (you wouldn't know if she was a fidgety sleeper. _You were too busy looking at her dreams after all_ ). Orange strands fall over her face so that it's hard to make out her expression. You brace yourself, expecting scorn narrowing her eyebrows, a new distrust shimmering over her eyes, and a scowl ready to tear into your throat but-

Scana takes back her hand and straightens up, feet moving to touch the floor. The look on her face is puzzled, mouth slightly open in... surprise?

"Did you see it?"

The words fall from her mouth quietly, barely audible, but in this room where the sound of rain doesn't echo any more, you can hear it.

"Did you see my dream?"

*CLATTER*

You're suddenly standing, hands slammed flat on your desk. Your breaths come hard and fast but your heart is thudding against your chest faster. You're on your feet as if you're about to fight her words - say something that'll make things better - but you have no words or the confidence to say them.

And you've still replied. Without giving yourself the chance to speak, you've already confirmed her answer.

Scana's sigh echoes around the room.

She stands up. You sit back down.

You scramble for words, for an apology, as she shuffles forward. You flinch when she approaches you but she walks past without a glance in your direction.

Way on the other side of your screen, she stops in front of the balcony doors, turns the doorknob, and disappears outside.

Seconds pass and you still sit there, staring at the screen. You keep sitting there until some reflexive motion moves your hand, trying to bring it up to your face, and your elbow knocks a pile of books sitting somewhere on your desk. The noisy clatter the books makes when they fall into a heap finally shocks your thoughts into motion.

Huh?

What happened?

She sighed, she stood up, and then she walked away?

You expected to be yelled at - rightfully - and for her to break off the deal right then and there. For her to throw things at you, for her eyes to grow wide with realization and fear, and yell, "I never want to see you again, freak! What the hell kind of Filanchan can look at _dreams_ -"

No, wait. That's just you bringing up old memories. Would the Scana you know really do that-

But then again, you're not sure what's happening right now. At the very least, that fiery presence you felt from Scana - the skeptical scowl, the strict but good-hearted scolding - is nowhere to be seen.

Where has the Scana you knew gone?

You feel like you missed something obvious- like an idiot. Once again, you feel like you can't solve a puzzle even though the answer should be right in front of your eyes-

Well. Actually. You always know what the solution is. Just like before, when you should've spoken and never did.

That makes you a coward.

And as a coward, you have a choice to make.

Do you abandon this drone, leave behind your relationship with Scana, and act like you never met?

_Creepy! Should you really be around people if you can't control it? Shouldn't you control yourself better-_

It might be for the best if you left. You're already staring down a life of isolation - living it already - and she could forget everything then-

_Don't you think you're too flaky? You always just leave whenever you want. Sometimes I wonder if we're really friends-_

-would it be for the best or would it-

_-when you never tell me what you really think._

-just make you regret everything like you always have?

A familiar wish falls from your lips in a whisper.

For the cowardly you, it's a start.

Without thinking, your fingers fly across the arrow keys. Your drone boldly takes flight and goes outside-

-where the sky is still covered in rain clouds but somehow bits of moonlight still manage to peek out. Outside, it's easier to hear the dying pitter-patters of rain, a light drizzle that will soon disappear. Outside, where Scana leans forward on the balcony's railing, her head still tilted down to look at the streets below.

By habit, you've veered away from her so you can't hear her thoughts.

But Scana is slow to react to your arrival. In the moments before and as she turns her head towards you, the thought finally comes to your mind-

Why could you never hear her thoughts?

No matter how much you had tried to resist before, you could never stop _yourself_ from hearing someone else's thoughts. Except for someone who dearly, desperately did not want to be heard.

With Scana, you let down your guard. So the answer to where the Scana you knew has gone-

She looks at you, the drone. Hunched-over, the railing completely supporting her frame, she looks defeated and worn-down. The expression on her face is blank and shell-shocked like she doesn't know what to do now. What comes next?

Behind the drone, the rustling of the pine trees fills the distance between the two of you. The seconds with silence pass.

And then Scana decides. Her expression becomes level, firm and decisive. Brows drawn forward, a set line of her lips. Straightening her back, she looks like someone who will see her decision through to the end.

She looks at you and her gaze does not waver. The answer is that Scana didn't go anywhere. She just let down her guard for a second.

"I'm breaking off our deal."

You lied. You didn't let down your guard at all.

This deal was obviously to protect Scana but it was your shield too.

A shield, so you never had to fill the awkwardness of an empty room (the deal always taking up the space), so you were never the one putting yourself out there to suggest what to do next (Scana had that on lock anyways), and so you never had to think about the choice to be selfish.

Because that's what it means to be open. To have someone else know things about you - the important things - that no one could ever guess if you don't open your mouth.

And it also means the shield was you choosing not to acknowledge that, to avert your eyes entirely. It was a mask that let you cover your eyes even though you see anyway. An excuse to tape up your mouth even though you speak anyway.

The choice was always there.

The cowardly, selfish you finally chooses to open your mouth.

"I don't want to."

**No, you should be apologizing first.**

"I'm sorry."

_That's better._

"But I don't want to."

**Is that all you can say?**

The beats of your heart are so loud that your voice sounds so quiet, almost nonexistent. All your thoughts are drowning in the sound, unable to tell you what you should say.

"I...I...."

What were you going to say?

A shuffling sound jolts you. When did your eyes start drifting away? On the screen, Scana has moved from the railing, standing closer to the balcony doors. Your heart jumps- _is she going to leave?_ \- but she has her arms crossed, a more defiant expression on her face. The look honestly sits on the boundary of defiance and mockery.

"What?" Scana says. "Say it."

She's provoking you but, considering you're the one who broke the deal, it wouldn't have been off if she'd just stormed away and closed the doors on you.

She's giving you a chance **even though you don't deserve it** \- Stop thinking like that.

"I..."

A familiar wish falls from your lips. But this time, you're yelling it.

"I wish I knew what to do too!"

You're not looking at the screen when you finish. You're just thinking, 'I've gone and done it now.' Mind empty and hands clenched into fists, you sit there frozen. Whatever you think of to say next doesn't seem to matter.

The silence is painful but you can't bring yourself to leave or turn off the screen. Again, all you can do is bear the disgusted, scornful eyes of someone else. You don't have the strength to be angry or selfish anymore.

It occurs to you that, even though you've seen her scowls and her skeptical expressions, you can't imagine a look of disgust on her face. It doesn't matter, you think, because you don't know her anyways.

Until she speaks up again.

"Is that it?" Scana asks. Her words are pushy just like you would expect. But her tone is patient. Kind in its patience. Kindness is what you expect from Scana.

You still feel cold, but you unclench your fists and shake your head a little. Every time, you always knew you had to say something. Felt it had to be something right then and there and it had to be the right answer.

That feeling paralyzed you.

But Scana isn't the kind of person to accept whatever you say. Before and probably now, those eyes of her will soften and ask you again. Or maybe those eyes will only grow more fierce. But she'll still ask you. Every insincere answer you gave, her skeptical scowl will appear.

You take a deep breath. Your hands press down flat, palms cold against your desk. From the speaker comes the rustle of the pine trees in the wind again. Silence will not be your companion. Refusing to look at the screen, in a small voice, you talk.

"I should have told you before we made that deal but my ability to read minds is stronger than most Filanchans'. It... it's the reason for everything."

You stop.

Everything is very _everything_ right now. The coldness from before now comes in flashes, tagteaming a sweltering heat that hurts. Your mind is struggling just to find a start somewhere and somehow lay down a path that covers everything you need to say. How can you possibly explain how messed-up your life has been since the day you-

"Filanchans are taught a principle as kids. Our ability to read minds can be uncontrollable but with discipline and hard work, anyone can control it. But even though I've believed in that principle my whole life, it just never- No one believes me when I say it's too hard to go outside. That I can't go out into crowds or even meet one person who just thinks so much. It's so intense that I... I..."

"You black out," Scana says. Surprised, you look up at the screen. There's a split second before your eyes register what's there when you have never regretted a reaction more, when you have never felt the total wrongness of your actions.

So when you see Scana, her arms crossed, looking at you without an ounce of expression, you feel a pang of relief. Her gaze is leveled at you, calm and measured, without disgust, without pity, without anything.

Her eyes aren't soft and you wonder if it's on purpose.

Is it so strange to believe that someone is listening to you? Wiping away any trace of their emotions in order to listen wholeheartedly to your words.

You feel the strangeness of it at the core of your being, your head turning away from the screen. It's somehow worse than when you could tell your words would never get through to the other person. Somehow, with the belief that this should actually be a good thing, you still manage to keep talking.

"...I gave up. No one believed me so I moved away and went to a place where nobody lived."

The more you talk, the worse the painful temperatures clash inside your body. Every word you say sounds selfish, like an explanation too long and too emotional for anyone to put up with. It doesn't feel good to explain. It's never, ever, felt good.

But this is... a responsibility you have to accomplish. You owe Scana an explanation, don't you?

So you open your mouth again, not really sure what other selfish things will spill out, but then-

"That must have been lonely," Scana says. "You like talking and meeting people."

...That- wasn't really something you expected to hear. It's. Um. Maybe you do enjoy it. It's hard to agree with it because every time you meet a person, you can only remember the past. It's painful every time you talk, every time you hear another person's thoughts.

There were lots of good moments mixed in, weren't there? But it's still hard to agree that talking to people is better than when you were alone.

Even now, as you're struggling to talk, the way Scana keeps surprising you, the way she keeps the conversation going _is a good moment_ but it still hurts. The cold and hot flashes do subside a little, as if you're getting used to it, but they still remain. It hurts that...

You don't confirm Scana's comment but you do keep going. Then, even if she rejects you, at least you did what you had to...

"Day and night, I lived like a hermit. I thought it would hurt less if I didn't meet anyone. But nothing got better. So I... thought if I changed just one thing- I thought if I met all kinds of people and saw all the things I couldn't get to see in person that something would change. That I'd be able to find what's been chewing at me all these years!

"But even though I built all these drones, even though I've met people and seen things I never could have even if I'd gone through the world in person, nothing has changed!"

You pause, breath suddenly wheezing. But you continue, even for a phrase embarrassing to say, because it's the truth.

"I'm still pathetic."

You stop again, hot and cold now crawling and squirming over every inch of your skin. Tears are at the edges of your eyes, a burning pain when they refuse to spill over. That last thing you said, you really shouldn't have. It's true but it's so wimpy. You're practically begging for pity. You hurry on to cover it up because what you really should be saying is-

"I... I don't want to cut off our deal because it changed something. When other people talked, when I heard their thoughts, it always seemed to cover up my words. It always seemed like I needed to talk more, to explain myself and why I did anything.

"I still don't know how to say it but it was like... there was less of me. Maybe I do like talking but I felt the need to keep talking whenever I met someone else so I could keep being myself. When I was alone, I kept talking to myself too.

"So it was different when we made that deal and I couldn't talk anymore. It was... okay not to talk. But there were points too when I wanted to and when I should have. That one change... changed a lot of things."

Where all these words coming from? But it feels right to say them. "What do you mean?" A question from Scana catches you off guard. You look up and Scana's gaze is questioning, searching. Her brows are drawn together in confusion.

"...I don't know what you're asking," you reply.

"When you say you don't want to cut off our deal, what do you want to keep happening?"

Oh. Well. Right, if you had been talking about the original deal, where you two would part ways when the ferry arrived the next day, then this whole thing seems much less urgent, doesn't it?

"I meant... I meant I wanted to keep traveling together."

Your eyes are still on the screen when you answer. Scana's expression freezes in place, still confused, and not an inch of her moves too. But moments pass and she closes her eyes, placing a hand to the side of her head.

"What do you mean?" She asks again.

"...I've met a lot of people but I didn't stick around anyone. Your-... your dream seemed to imply the same. That you wanted to find something somewhere out there.

"The two of us have been alone for a long time. Because our short time together helped me, even though I always thought this was something I had to get over alone... I thought that maybe traveling with someone might help you too."

"It could change something?" She said quietly, almost unheard to you. You don't know if you should answer but-

"Changing one thing might change everything else," you say.

Scana doesn't reply but her head tilts down a little like a small nod. It's not a direct answer though. So you wait.

Then, Scana looks up and her gaze is calm, measured once again. "We heard a lot of wishes today. Wishes that we can grant," she says. "But would granting those wishes really make them happy? Are they just grasping at straws, guessing at what they want, but in the end they still remain unfulfilled?"

You hear her words and you don't know if you're reading them right. But already, you feel that your answer remains only this: "Are you asking if it's worth trying at all?"

Scana's expression doesn't change but you get the feeling she's thinking about her answer. Grappling with what to do next. A small sigh escapes her lips and her eyes close for a second.

"Tomorrow, the ferry departs," she says. Your heart drops. "I'll see you in the morning."

Wait, what??? What does that mean??? Does it mean she's okay with seeing you again????

You scramble for words to ask but Scana only walks past the open balcony doors and moves to close them. Just before they click shut, she says, "Oh, and stay out here. Don't look at my dreams again."

*click*

????????? You are very confused. But that was definitely, probably an okay.

In the distance, the pine trees rustle again but softly. The wind is dying down, the storm having finally fully passed by. The silence that follows after is one of relief.


	8. Epilogue

The sky above is blue, the sun gracing the ferry and the lake below with sunlight. The grey storm clouds are still visible but disappearing far into the distance. In this cool morning air, there is a serene quiet where only the splashes of the lake's waves knocking against the boat interrupt. In short, it is-

"A nice morning, isn't it?!" A high-pitched voice finishes Scana's thought and it isn't the first time she's wondered if the person behind the drone is privy to the inside of her head after all.

Scana takes a look at the drone now, hovering near the back of the ferry, and it's spinning circles like it can't get enough of the crystal clear lake water, the pine trees lining the shores, or the bright blue sky. Scana takes a few seconds to come up with a reply but the drone pauses in its sight-seeing to turn toward Scana.

"Oh, I didn't have time to ask because we were running late," they start, still light-hearted and energetic, "but did you have a good sleep?"

Scana takes another second to think over her answer and decides to tease the drone a little. "Better after I closed the doors."

Their response is immediate: a thunking sound like they hit their head on their desk before they rush to say, "Ah, I'm sorry! I was going to leave out the balcony but I didn't expect you to fall asleep so soon..."

Their voice is sheepish and sincere. Of course Scana already forgave them but now that they mention it, she feels a little embarrassed that she _had_ fallen asleep so quickly. It isn't often that she speaks to so many people in a day. It was more tiring than she expected to traverse across the whole town... and keeping an eye on someone else too.

No, the right way to say it would be "feeling self-conscious and worried about the other at the same time."

...anyways.

"It's alright. I didn't mind that part," Scana finally says. "I was more worried about- no. Nevermind."

She cuts herself off. If they don't get it, it's better not to say it.

Scana doesn't let the silence that descends worry her. It's such a beautiful morning that it would be a waste to do so. Even the occasional spray from when the breeze hits the splashing water is refreshing. Besides, the drone is still facing her. They must be thinking of how to say what they want to say next.

"Hey, Scana, what does Quoran tea tastes like?"

Their question is surprisingly casual and normal. Even if it does bring up bittersweet memories. An image of her sister mischeviously 'requesting' her to brew some flashes through her mind, small hands wrapped around a blue porcelain mug. It takes Scana a devastating self-control not to clench her fist.

"...It's warm with a spicy aftertaste like cinnamon."

"Where is Quoran grown?"

Are they taking a rapid-fire approach? Why would they bother- unless they're trying to feel out where Scana is most uncomfortable? Pushing the limit does seem to be a tendency.

Scana doesn't respond immediately. She doesn't know what about the question or any of these subjects has them poking at a sore spot but she tries to remain as calm and unaffected as possible.

Instead of clenching her fist, she pushes her open palm against the seat below her. To her surprise, a gentle vibrating makes itself known, probably coming from the engine somewhere inside the ferry. It keeps Scana in the present however much her thoughts demand her to keep quiet and ignore everyone and everything else.

If digging deep into someone else is the drone's tendency with other people, then shutting up is Scana's.

"In places commonly called 'burning plains' which often experience wildfires cyclically." That's all Scana wants to say about those places. She decides to lead the flow of conversation somewhere else. "Have you never seen one?"

"Nope. It's only been a couple years since I started building drones so they need to come back a lot for maintenance. A lot of what I know is from what I read in books or heard from people." The drone does a little twirl in the air, seemingly just for style. "I got a little curious... I'm sorry if I overstepped!"

Given the dream they had seen, Scana doubts it was only curiosity. But she doesn't get what they're aiming for.

"Even if you did overstep, I wouldn't respond." And it's true. Normally, Scana would never have answered a question about Quoran or the burning plains. She wouldn't even entertain small talk and there have been plenty of opportunities with nosy and curious travelers, merchants, and other people over all these years.

It is, maybe, the first time she's ever been so straightforward or talkative to anyone. "Don't worry yourself over me," Scana says.

"That's good to hear but... I'll still worry anyways," the drone says. "You would say the same thing too."

...Well, Scana didn't think she would be attacked like this but the truth is the truth.

"So Scana... you don't have to answer. I'm just a little confused. You said that you don't know what you want but your dream kind of seemed to say different. How come?"

...They know how she would respond negatively so they took a chance, huh?

"If you don't get it, then you don't have to get it."

A harsh way to say it but Scana would rather not discuss a terrible thing to someone who wouldn't understand it-

"Well- no," the drone interrupts. Their voice is still clear with not an inch of worry, fear, confusion, nor anger. "I did get it. I'm just wondering... really? What kind of death would you want then?"

...How is Scana supposed to respond to that? The ferry still vibrating under her fingertips, she looks away from the drone and plants her gaze to the right instead. In the distance, there are no more pine trees. This ferry is supposed to be shipping her across a lake but it's so huge that it almost feels like a sea or that it's part of the ocean. It also means no escape from this question which she wouldn't have been able to escape from anyways, no matter the place.

While she's still scrambling for an answer, the drone continues, "It's scary to think about how you might want to die. It's almost as scary as almost dying. It really makes you think, 'Ah, if that happens, I'd rather die than wake up again,' you know?"

Their voice doesn't waver until just slightly at the end. Scana is surprised at how much self-control they do have. It really does speak to the enormity of their mind-reading problem if they can speak so easily about this.

"You sound like you have experience," Scana replies simply. Belatedly, she realizes that not only is she stalling but she also feels cold from the tip of her head to the end of her toes. It is a feeling she has not experienced since the day she came across an empty plain with tall yellow grass swaying in the breeze. Is this how talking about your issues supposed to feel?

"Haha, well, I try not to think about it," the drone's voice hardly cuts through the cold but it still remains audible. "I'm sorry I asked you about something so personal. I was just a little worried because if it isn't your real wish in the end..."

"I don't want to regret it either," Scana says. "That is also how you feel, isn't it?"

"...Yup! That's why I'm still kicking around." The drone seems overjoyed and the twirl it makes is for more than show this time. "Plus I may not have seen the whole world but I've still seen a lot of it through these drones. And I just wouldn't feel right if I wasn't sure if the sights and the people I saw really didn't make me feel a single thing about living."

Maybe it's the fact that someone else finally put it into words. If it were anyone else, wouldn't they feel disgusted at how uncaring she remains at even the most beautiful waterfall, at a cloud which just looked so much like a rabbit, or the sound of the rain falling at night. It is a a worry she's always felt as a human being traversing through this vast and beautiful world and somehow still feeling lifeless, careless, and lonely.

"If I'm going to die," Scana finally answers, "then I would want a peaceful death that didn't hurt."

"Hehe, me too. That makes us kind of cowardly, huh?"

"It does."

Both the drone and Scana share a little laugh, interrupting both the quiet air and the little splashes. It's been awhile since she had discovered this quiet desire within herself and it's the first time she's ever been so carefree around it.

It's nice not to tiptoe.

The dream that has haunted her since that day two years ago may continue to be a nightmare but just for today it was a blessing.

"So," Scana starts again when she had finished giggling. "I did wonder- you built this drone yourself?"

"Yupperonis! I was already studying electronics back when I lived in Filancha so naturally I ended up trying to using tech stuff to fix my problems. That's how all engineers kind of end up going- or at least that's what my classmates always did." It really is almost incredible and heart-breaking how easily they can talk about the past and the people that hurt them. Again, there was only the slightest of wavers at the end of their words. The drone does not twirl. "Gotta admit though! Drones are way harder to learn than I thought they'd be. This little one is gonna have to come back for repairs in a month or two."

"Hmm, I don't know a lot about drones but do they normally last that long?"

Scana can certainly call herself educated and intelligent but most of her traveling takes to rural areas inhabited by few people like this grey, wishing town that's no longer in sight. It's been awhile since she's been to a city and it sounds like she's gotten out of touch.

"Weeeell, technology has gotten pretty good these days but so has the magicks side of things. I'm kinda using both right now to give my drones a longer life and a safer one. Pretty hard though since mixing magicks and tech is a new field just by itself!"

"Hmm, I see... I think you would get along with Dr. Bureak very well."

Scana never did get what her friend was constantly experimenting and innovating on but she has a better idea now. No wonder the lab exploded so much.

"Ohhhhh, that's what your friend works on??? That sounds so cool; I'd love to meet her!" The drone twirls as they talk with delight. "I keep searching over the internet for anything related to the magitech field but there's so little stuff it's so disappointing-"

The drone rattles on from there, clearly enraptured by their field. Scana lets their words wash over her. The words don't make a single bit of sense to her and probably ever won't. In fact, it reminds her of the passionate speeches Dr. Bureak would also make about her inventions. Yes, these two would get along swimmingly alright. And between them both, she can remain Dr. Bureak's little assistant who goes and gets her ingredients. Speaking of which...

"Do you think your drone can last long enough to visit the doctor? I do have a delivery to make to her after all," Scana asks when the drone starts to wind down from their passionate speech about a magitech theory and the crazy ways it worked in practice. "It's about two week's travel but maybe a month if the weather isn't on our side."

"Hm... it's kind of risky to be honest. I don't want to get in your way if this drone does break down at all." Their voice is thoughtful and sincere but there's a slight undercurrent running through too. It sounds like disappointment. "And I don't think she's enjoy... you know."

"She wouldn't mind that part. Filanchans almost never leave their island so she's always wanted to pick the brain of someone who could pick the brains of other people." Scana has always known the doctor to be open, curious, and thoughtful. She may maintain a mad-scientist-like air but the woman has always stuck tightly to her empathetic and kind principles since the day she split ties with a larger group of her colleagues.

Scana also adds this as an afterthought, "And I don't mind waiting. We are traveling together after all."

"...Oh, that's too nice of you!! Still, it's better to check in on what your friend thinks." Just a phone call should suffice and it may make a good first meeting between the two. Alright, Scana can arrange that very easily. "And well, the drone should be fine along the way even if it takes a month but it might break down when we reach Dr. Bureak's place. The voice system will still work but the drone itself won't be able to move. Is that okay?"

"Oh, certainly. It means you can't resist at all while Dr. Bureak inspects every bit of that drone's insides."

"...Wow, that sounds amazing."

Somehow the conversation has reached a point where the two of them are laughing again.

This time, it's the drone who speaks up after they finish. "Oh yeah, Scana."

"Yes?" Her reply is slightly wavering as it slips out through lips curved in a smile.

"What did you eat for dinner yesterday?"

Scana does have to take a second to think about it. "I had some sandwiches packed away. I had forgotten to stop by a market and buy dinner before it got dark."

"...Was it enough?"

"Well... until this morning. But I feel fine." Scana is more than used to forgetting her meals that it almost feels like her stomach has gotten used to the hunger pangs too.

"That's no good, Scana!! You have to eat properly!!" The drone sounds rightly concerned for her and it's still uncomfortable hearing someone else's kindness aimed at her so she changes the subject.

"Well, what did you eat yesterday?"

"Uh- I ate a ton of course!" It looks like the drone does not always lie well.

"I never once heard you get up," Scana bluntly states.

"... Ahhh, you got me! Okay, I'll eat better if you do!"

It's at this point that Scana wonders if her first impression of a timid, helpless, but energetic person hiding themself behind a drone was wrong. They can really talk themself into someone's heart.

"...Alright, it's a deal until the day we part."

"No way, take care of yourself after!!"

**Author's Note:**

> Please assume the drone does not make noise...


End file.
